8 Mumbai malls that need to be CRUSHED right now

Everyone talks about the best malls in Mumbai entertainment spaces that are loved for their shopping, food and gaming options. And while we cannot thank some of them enough, there are others that get on our nerves.

We are talking about the most useless malls in the city. (Sorry, we couldnt find a way to sugar-coat this!) Known for an odd store here, an empty McDonalds there and even a pirated DVD stall if you look closely their ugly structures are not just an eyesore, their existence is purposeless. If we ever got our hands on a bulldozer, wed like to run them over. (BMC, do the deed for us!)

Image from Wonobo

Eternity Mall, Thane

Located in Thane, its the worst place to shop, eat or drink. The only silver lining we see is a discreet washroom on the second floor. To which you will have to climb the escalators because, hey, defunct mall, defunct facilities. Which other mall has less than 10 people on a Sunday afternoon?

Our suggestion: A massive space for washrooms for the public. Clean Sarvajanic Shauchalayas would sure be way more useful.

Image from Foursquare

Citi Centre, Goregaon

Enter the mall and you are sure to mistake it for the Goregaon station itself. Except there is way more action at the station. And you have a reason to go to the station.

Our suggestion: Demolish and use the space for parking. God knows SV Road needs a few.

Image from Evershine Mall’s website

Evershine Mall, Malad

A two-storey McDonalds and an automobile store that’s all this mall has. Flanked by Inorbit on side and Infiniti 2 on the other, we wonder how it has any integrity to go on standing. As for the name, misleading is the word.

Our suggestion: Knock it down, mercilessly. The country can do without one McDonalds and Link Road needs all the space it can possibly get.

Image by WProperty

Citi Mall, Andheri

If it wasn’t for PVR ECX (hail cheap tickets and movie premiers) and Dunkin Donuts, this mall would be history. While we still marvel at the economics, it is as empty as a box can get a dead box with a glamorous facade.

Our suggestion: Bring it down and create a full-blown cultural space. Already home to MAMI and the like, it wont need to do much and we can keep the lesser-priced PVR.

Image from Gupta & Sen Luxury Real Estate Consultants

Om Heera Panna, Oshiwara

There is an old, decrepit mall called Om Heera Panna, surrounding the very famous Gold’s Gym and Pratap Da Dhaba. That’s all that needs to be said about this old, wiggly, useless piece of shit.

Our suggestion: A Gold’s Gym big enough to accommodate all the Andheri starlets and struggling actors. (Will that prompt them to reduce the rates?) And, of course, Pratap Da Dhaba occupying a place of prominence. Eating with a gym in plain-view? We call that admirable defiance.

Image from Wonobo

Huma Mall, Kanjurmarg West

That there is a BIG Cinemas stuck here was big news for us. It looks like midway the builder got confused between constructing a mall, a chawl and a hideout for drug addicts! Who the hell gave the licence to build a structure as hideous as this?

Our suggestion: We need a vigilante group that saves precious historical monuments and destroys these instead. Why can’t this be a reality?

Image by Panoramio

Dreams – The Mall, Bhandup

Last we heard, it was to be converted into a 230-bed hospital and the BMC had issued notices for misusing common areas. BEST move ever, by the BMC. Don’t go by it’s comical, flashy appearance; it really has no hope.

Our suggestion: Get that hospital going. Fast.

Image by Hub Pages

Milan Mall, Santacruz

It had 190 stores once, then it was touted to be a mall for a wholesale garment market. We think that’s a good idea, if only it ever got going.

Our suggestion: You haven’t quite lived in Mumbai if you haven’t been stuck at Milan junction. Free up the space now, we say.

Once upon a time, visiting a mall served two purposes: an air-conditioned space to hang out and window shopping till the cows came home. But theres only so many showrooms of clothes and mobiles we need. And frankly, Khaugallis and street shopping do a better job anyway.

Know any other mall that needs to shut down? Write to us at pr@nearfox.com

The main image for this article was sourced from iKinja

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